Tofu-a-phobia

If you check out tofu in the Webster's "New World" Dictionary (is that similar to the Old Testament vs the New Testament?) it states that tofu is a bland, cheeselike food, rich in protein, coagulated from an extract of soybeans.  But I think that it should be re-defined as the spooky white blob that makes people shudder when the prospect of digesting it crosses their minds. I have difficulty computing tofu-a-phobia, because really, tofu is to soy milk what cheese is to cow's milk. Except one starts as a bean, and the other starts as a calf. One is vegetable based and one is animal based.

I think that is where people start to get all wiggy. There is a lifestyle that is connected to the use of these rubbery white blobs. No, I should rephrase that; there is a stereotype that is connected to the use of these rubbery white blobs. If I eat tofu, suddenly I am going to want to grow my armpit hair long enough that I can braid it into a haltertop to cover my pendulous breasts that are going to flow freely and unrestrained at the next folk festival. While there, I will create many love children with pot smoking free spirited lovers of trees. We will drive away on our bicycles into the sunset, making macrame flower pot holders and singing about fighting the good fight as we go. And we will eat tofu; lots and lots of tofu. Right now you're either offended, petrified or laughing at the absurdity of it all. That really won't happen if you eat tofu, unless you want it to. (And really, it sounds like a hell of a lot of fun to me, except for the armpit thing, and I'm not too good with macrame...)

Ok, but let's get serious here, and really look at what tofu IS. It is just a base, just like other ingredients that we put in to other foods that we eat. I substitute tofu for cheese in my lasagna. I substitute soft tofu for yogurt or cream cheese in my baking. I chop tofu up and put it in my soups. The point is that tofu does not have any flavour what so ever. It is like the chameleon of the food world, and just takes on the flavour of whatever absorbs in to it. I wouldn't eat a block of raw tofu just like I wouldn't eat a box of plain gelatin or a bag of flour. That would be yucky. But if you're not interested in getting the high animal fat content that you get from cheese or meat, tofu is an awesome substitute. But be forwarned that buying tofu hotdogs, and tofu salami and tofu chicken burgers are actually not a great substitute for the "real thing" and can actually be higher in carcinogens than the real thing. It's the same with any overtly processed food. Just remember, if you don't understand what the ingredients say on the package, best bet is that you shouldn't buy it, let alone digest it. (Do you know that Canadian Kraft dinner has an orange dye in it that is actually banned in the states? Why do you want your poop to glow in the dark?)

So now you're probably asking yourself, "Is Rhonda a vegetarian? Is she vegan? Is she a tofugian?" (haha I just made that one up.) No, I'm none of the above and as I've stated before, I HATE labels, especially ones connected to the food I'm choosing to eat. That's ridiculous. I just want to be around for a while, and if my body is a machine (oh yeah, baby, it's a machine...haha) then I want to try to fuel it with good fuel, like high grade octane, not the cheap stuff like I put in my car. Tofu is on that list of high octane good fuel, for sure.

So, the next time you're in the grocery store, buy a block. Yeah, everyone is going to be looking at you with "that look" and making a mental note to themselves to not go over to your place for supper for a while, but who cares. Go home, take your bra off, crank some good folky music and make the tofu lasagna recipe I'm going to leave you with.

Yummy Veggie Tofu Lasagna


2 or 3 small zucchini
1 block firm tofu, drained
1 can black beans
1 block tofu mozza cheese “loaf” (***optional***) or you can just use some real cheese if you want that flavour added to it.
A variety of veggies such as:
1 bag fresh spinach, chopped
Broccoli chopped small
½ red pepper
½ orange pepper
1 small onion, finely chopped
A good handful of fresh mushrooms
A couple julienned carrots
Pickled hot pepper rings chopped finely (this adds some awesome zing to the lasagna)
A can of whole plum tomatoes, diced and save the juice for sautéing the veggies
A big can or jar of tomato sauce of your choice
Seasoning such as minced garlic, garlic powder, and Italian seasoning, extra thyme and a bit of cayenne pepper


1. Set oven to 375.
2. Slice all zucchini very thin, length wise and place in casserole dish, layered is fine, with a bit of water and steam in the microwave for approximately 5 minutes until semi-soft. (I used a cheese cutter to cut my zucchini). Then lay them on paper towel to dry.
3. Put the tofu block in a medium bowl and mash with a potato masher. Mix in the soy cheese if you’re going to use it with the mashed tofu. Thoroughly season this mixture liberally with thyme.
4. Drain and rinse the black beans. You’ll thank me later. Haha
5. Add the chopped up veggies and spinach to a frying pan (like a big cast iron pan)using the canned tomato juices as your “sauteing” medium and cook on medium heat until all of the veggies are soft and the liquid is gone from the pan.
6. I add a lot of seasoning to this mixture and lots of minced garlic (about two heaping teaspoons!). Once all of the liquid is “cooked off” this mixture can be left until assembly time, but make sure to shut off the stove.
7. Mix your tomato sauce and any left over diced tomatoes together in a bowl. Add some extra thyme or Italian seasoning if you’d like.
8. Use a 9x13 casserole dish, and spray liberally with cooking spray or olive oil.
9. Put a layer of tomato sauce mixture on the bottom and then a layer of zucchini “noodles”.
10. Sprinkle ½ the can of black beans on top of the zucchini.
11. Add more tomato sauce and then half of the veggie mixture.
12. Sprinkle half of the tofu mixture on top of this.
13. Add another layer of zucchini and start the process again.
14. The top layer of zucchini should be covered with the rest of the tomato sauce.
15. Cook for approximately 40-45 minutes. Then I shut the oven off and allow the lasagna to sit in the oven until the stove is cooled. At this time, you might want to put a layer of aluminum foil on the top so that the veggies don’t get too crispy on top.
16. When it’s warm it doesn’t slice as nicely as it does when it’s cooled, but it’s still really, really yummy. Especially the next day.
17. PS: If you divide your lasagna into 10 hardy pieces, each piece is still only 150 calories, if you’re a calorie counter. Enjoy!

tofu education